I am 16 years old and I am not a virgin. I lost my virginity this past summer to a guy who seemed to be a good friend. I met him in 8th grade and he was nothing more than a friend. In ninth grade, I realized that I had feelings for him. I got his number and gave him a call. We both enjoyed each other's company, and started to talk more often, but just as friends. We would talk all the time about this girl he liked and I kept my feelings for him aside. We continued to talk for four months, becoming best friends. All the while, I wanted more than just friends, so I told him about my feelings. The feeling was mutual. I was ecstatic when he told me; everything that I had been wishing for was happening. We started going out soon thereafter, and I had my first kiss. Two weeks later he broke up with me. He said things weren't working out. For the next year he hardly said Hi to me. I was so heart broken that I thought the world, as I know it, was over.  I finally got over him in the first semester of 11th grade. Things got back to normal, but for some reason he was starting to be nicer to me. He would say Hi to me in the school halls and call me on a regular basis. Sometimes we would go to parties together and one thing would lead to another. Drinking would usually be involved and we would always end up making out or something along those lines. He made me feel special; he made me feel wanted. I started to have feelings for him, again. The only problem was that made sure that he thought that it was nothing more than a "one night stand" type of hooking up. And it was a lie. I had such strong feelings for him but I kept on keeping them a secret. He never showed me any sort of feelings of love and would imply that sex was not a product of love but a "thing" that I would have to do to keep him interested. I ended up sleeping with him. I kept telling myself that sleeping with him didn't matter, because my virginity was not worth keeping. Right after, he stopped calling me and my heart broke in two. He stopped calling because he got what he wanted and didn't need me anymore. But, I still needed him. 


Two weeks later, I met another guy that was truly interested in me. He was so sweet and so wonderful to me. I tried to think about the new guy as much as possible and try and forget the first who broke my heart. Just to move on, I pretended to have feelings for my new guy. And, I ended up having sex with him too. At this point, my life was getting out of hand. I would always be getting drunk at parties and having sex with guys. I took control of my life and decided now that sex can wait till I find the right person. The guy I lost my virginity to does not even talk to me anymore unless to make feel like a slut. 

My advice is to everyone is don't have sex unless you understand how sex can really change your life. It's not a sport or hobby it is something that is special and should only be shared with someone special. You could have gotten pregnant or contracted a sexually transmitted disease. You look back and wonder, "What was I thinking?" Because now all you can do is look back and say I lost my virginity to a jerk